"I want to feel completely owned and controlled. I want there to be noaspect of my life that I do not have to worry about. I want to feelloved and cared for by my owner on one hand, but like I have to walk oneggshells on the other. I want to feel happy, but also a sense of fear.I want there to be no escape. I want to be humiliated and degraded andused for the enjoyment of my owner. I want to know that I will be safefrom permanent injury, but that my feelings will be secondary. I wantto be chastised and know that I am at the mercy of my owner for anypersonal pleasures. I want my pleasures to be coupled with humiliationuntil I cannot even achieve an orgasm without feeling deeply shamed. Iwant my mind so twisted that I get sexually excited when humiliated andI want degrading fetishes to be programmed into me. I want to getexcited by the mere hint that I might get to suck a cock. I want tocrave cum and the taste of piss and feel sad when I am denied it. Iwant licking an asshole clean to. How long?”“Seven years.”“Wow. Yeah, you guys have been married that long and she’s only sucked you twice ... I don’t know. I mean, I understand, but I can’t think of a way around it.” I glanced at him as I clicked the turn signal for the turn onto the paved highway. He was just staring out the windshield with no real expression. It worried me because Tom had seemed more distant the last couple of weeks.Even when we were fishing, his joking and kidding were not up to his usual banter. I had to say something else. “I really don’t have any good advice, man. I mean, I wish I did. I wish I could just tell you to do such and such and have everything smooth out for you and Vanessa but I can’t. I’m sorry.” I was still signaling but had yet to turn. There was nobody behind us. I reached and gripped Tom’s shoulder through his Carhartt jacket. “I’ll be happy to listen any time Tom. I want you to know that. Even if I don’t have answers, sometimes it helps to just discuss it.” He turned his sad.
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